New Beginnings

How does one adequately express the events of a year? Like me, I’m sure you have already seen a thousand and one Instagram reels and Tiktok videos of persons putting their year in review but just how accurate are all those anyways? I always feel nostalgic when it gets to the end of the year, I can feel myself trying to resist the change I know is coming, wanting to stay a little longer in this inevitable ending. I think the reason is that I’m not such a big fan of change and a new year represents a mandatory change that does not require anybody’s consent.

2022 only has a couple of days before it is gone, forever. I think about where I was at the beginning of the year and where I am now and it almost doesn’t even feel like the same year, so much has changed. Is this how it is for everybody? Some dreams you watched never come to fulfilment while you now live in some realities you never dreamed about. It’s just this big ball of emotions that you can never actually explain. In some moments I find myself wishing I could freeze time and put that moment in a plastic bag that I could carry everywhere with me. But. I once heard someone say that if we never leave one amazing moment, how do we expect to experience the next? And so, no matter how awesome this year has been or just the sheer fact that I’m nervous about starting something new, I have to let go so I can experience other things and maybe sit here in a year’s time writing the same thing.

Sometimes I worry about the speed in which life seems to be moving. Moment to moment, almost like we can never seem to catch our breath or truly appreciate it. But they are called moments for a reason, we aren’t meant to spend forever in them. I miss the way a lot of things were but I know I have to keep moving if I ever want to experience how things could be. It doesn’t diminish the specialness of those moments; it just makes room for greatness that I never thought I could experience more than once.

I remember when I left secondary school, I wasn’t too bothered about making friends in the university because I already had the best ones. But. I’m glad I did; imagine all the great moments I would have missed out on if I never moved forward. Funnily enough, I had the exact same thought when I went to law school but here I am again, unable to imagine life without my law school friends. It hasn’t changed the fact that my secondary school and university friends are still the best, it just means I was able to experience more love, laughter, joy and more everything by opening my heart to the new.

As I find myself on the threshold of a new year, I also find myself at crossroads. Wanting to hold on to everything 2022 was because of how special it was but at the same time wanting to embrace 2023 for everything awesome it’s going to be. Having to remind myself that embracing the new doesn’t diminish the impact or the value or the beauty or the genuineness of the old.

Someone once said we shouldn’t mourn moments that have passed but rather open ourselves to the events that are about to take place. So that’s all I’m really trying to do. 2023 is going to be great, I can feel it and maybe I need to know that 2022 is always going to be with me no matter how in love I eventually fall with 2023. (Inserts wry smile)

What about you? How does the end of a year make you feel? No matter what I hope you know that the greatest adventure yet awaits you. You may have a ton of plans or just rough sketches or none at all, the year may already be looking hopeful or not but either way I need you to know that 2023 is a year like we have never seen. It’s going to be everything and nothing like we have planned.

My biggest advice? Give it to God, just ask Him to take control because that way whether your plans pan out or not, you will be confident that you are in His perfect will for you. Give it to God. Sometimes I tell God, “God I can’t see, I can’t see how things are going to go so please take control.” Whether you can “see” how 2023 will go or not, I hope you will be pre-emptive enough to give everything to Him.

I know I will love 2023 but for now, I’m really going to miss 2022. Cheers to another adventure and new beginnings, it has been my greatest privilege writing to you this past year. Until the next chapter, all my love.

Fay.